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No, not that kind of lesbian twins

June 17, 2011

Between Minnesota’s nasty rash of anti-marriage-equality legislation, Target’s generous donations to anti-gay candidates, and the Twins’ inability to win any game in which Francisco Liriano doesn’t take a no-hitter into the seventh, it was already a tough season to be an LGBT fan at Target Field—and then this happened:

A lesbian couple was scolded by a security guard at a May 27 Minnesota Twins game for exchanging a brief kiss at Target Field.

The security guard reportedly told Taylor Campione and Kelsi Culpepper, “We don’t play grab ass here,” and that they must “adhere to the 10 Commandments”….

Damn straight! Listen up, sinners: God may have made an exception to allow games on the Sabbath, but if there’s one commandment that he and the good men of Major League Baseball aren’t about to budge on, it’s the one that says “Thou shalt not play same-sex grab-ass”!


P.S. Dianagram of Value Over Replacement Grit had the best response to this story: “The guard is claiming he isn’t used to seeing anyone reach first base at Target Field.” That’s a winner!

P.P.S. You can view a larger version of the grab-ass collage above by clicking on it. If you want to anger God.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. RachelB permalink
    June 20, 2011 12:39 pm

    Back when the Twins were playing at the Metrodome, I saw more than one marriage proposal on the Jumbotron during televised games. Complete with kissing. I call bullshit on that security guard.

  2. June 20, 2011 11:14 pm

    I love the collage.


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